Notice to All Employees Concerning the Obama Administration

As of November 5, 2008, when President Obama is officially elected into office, our company will install a few new policies which are in keeping with his new, inspiring issues of change and fairness:

1. All salespeople will be pooling their sales and bonuses into a common pool that will be divided equally between all of you.  This will serve to give those of you who are underachieving a fair shake.

2. All low level workers will be pooling their wages, including overtime, into a common pool, dividing it equally amongst yourselves.  This will help those who are too busy for overtime to reap the rewards from those who have more spare time and can work extra hours.

3. All top management will now be referred to as the government.  We will not participate in this pooling experience because the law doesn’t apply to us.

4. The government will give eloquent speeches to all employees every week, encouraging it’s workers to continue to work hard for the good of all.

5. The employees will be thrilled with these new policies because it’s good to spread the wealth.  Those of you who have underachieved will finally get an opportunity; those of you who have worked hard and had success will feel more patriotic.

6.  The last few people who were hired should clean out their desks.  Don’t feel bad, though, because President Obama will give you free healthcare, free handouts, free oil for heating your home, free food stamps, and he’ll let you stay in your home for as long as you want even if you can’t pay your mortgage.  If you appeal directly to our democratic congress, you might even get a free flat screen TV and a coupon for free haircuts. (Shouldn’t all Americans be entitled to nice looking hair?)

7. If for any reason you are not happy with the new policies, you may want to rethink your vote on November 4th.

WOUNDED WARRIOR: DEAR MR. OBAMA



sacrifice.

Aerosmith’s Joe Perry: A McCainiac?

You Know It.

Tito the Builder

Hot Air’s Got It

Published in: on October 28, 2008 at 11:00 am  Comments (1)  
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CLOSING THE DEAL: A Roadmap for Campaign 2008’s Homestretch

Must Read: H/T Hot Air

By Guy Benson (www.guybensonshow.com) and Mary Katharine Ham (www.weeklystandard.com), Editor and Contributor, Ed Morrissey

THE CONTEXT

If recent polls are to believed, freshman Senator Barack Obama has a better than average chance of becoming America’s 44th President, the Commander-in-Chief of the planet’s most powerful military, and the proverbial leader of the free world. It’s worth mentioning that just four years ago as President Bush and Senator John Kerry were vying for the White House, Obama was still a part-time State Senator representing a liberal district in Chicago. Before that he was an attorney and, famously, a community organizer. In 2008, Obama has positioned himself as a post-partisan, thoughtful moderate with the superior judgment required to lead the country. These are lofty promises from a man with precious little executive experience, and a Senate career that lasted exactly 143 legislative days before he launched yet another campaign for higher office. No one can deny his ambition. In fact, if Obama wins on November 4th—and serves one full term in the Oval Office—the Presidency of the United States would be the longest consecutively held full-time job he has ever held without seeking another.

Barack Obama promises “change,” which is an appealing concept to an American public weary of a beleaguered administration and worried about the future. They are faced with a candidate who promises them everything: Tax cuts for 95% of Americans, universal healthcare, peace, saving the planet, and—according to his wife—the “healing” of Americans’ souls. As the saying goes, if something sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Questions abound: Is this man prepared to be president? Does he hold mainstream values and policy preferences? Who has influenced his thinking, and where does he want to take the country? Has he been honest with the people from whom he seeks votes?

FILE: ABORTION

Barack Obama is out of the political mainstream on abortion. Don’t take our word for it, just listen to Sen. Obama’s own statements. In his final debate with John McCain, Obama asserted that “nobody is pro-abortion.” If you don’t have the time to read Princeton University professor Robert P. George’s detailed argument that Obama may actually fit that description, consider the candidate’s own record. In the clips below, you will hear Obama say three things.

First, he tells an audience that if his own daughters experienced an unexpected teen pregnancy, he wouldn’t want them “punished with a baby.”

Second, he pledges to a Planned Parenthood gathering that the very first thing he’d do as president is sign the Freedom Of Choice Act, which—according to the bill’s own supporters — would abolish bans on partial-birth abortion and parental notification laws nationwide while implementing tax-payer funded abortions. All three positions are wildly unpopular with the vast majority of Americans, yet they are Obama’s top priorities—just ask him:

Finally, Obama argues against the Born Alive Infant Protection Act as an Illinois Senator in 2002. Despite Obama’s protestations otherwise, he voted three separate times against this legislation, which was designed to require life-saving care for infants who survive botched abortions. This is a matter of record. Not only did an identical bill pass Congress without a single dissenting vote, the explanation Obama has offered for years to defend these votes has been exposed as a lie. Furthermore, Hot Air has a long list of supporting posts on this very subject:

Listen to Obama complain that providing care to these accidentally-born infants would place an undue burden on the woman and her abortionist:

Americans of good faith are divided on this issue. Many are pro-life, and many are pro-choice. Obama’s extreme record should horrify the former group, and should even give significant pause to the latter. Ask yourself, are babies “punishment”? Would you vote for the Freedom of Choice Act and against the Born Alive Infant Protection Act…three times?

FILE: TAXES

As a skilled rhetorical magician, Obama presents himself as a tax-cutter. Even though he’s voted dozens of times to raise taxes, he assures Americans that 95% of us will have our taxes slashed under his plan. The Wall Street Journal isn’t buying it. Once again, though, the best way to assess someone’s positions is to listen to his own language. Note the two telling exchanges that follow:

First, Obama tells newly-minted national celebrity “Joe the Plumber” that his tax hikes on the so-called rich are designed to “spread the wealth around,” which Obama explains is “good for everybody.” Does that sound like a genuine tax-cutter to you?

Second, Obama is challenged by ABC News anchor Charlie Gibson at a primary debate in Pennsylvania. Gibson asks Obama why he insists on raising capital gains taxes (which affect millions of American investors) even after history has proven that raising said taxes actually decreases government revenues from the taxes, and cutting capital gains taxes actually brings more revenue into federal coffers. Obama has no answer, other than to blow off all the evidence, and say that raising taxes is the fair thing to do—practical consequences be damned.

Someone so obsessed with the concept of “fairness” is unlikely to be a friend to taxpayers. Obama’s record over his brief legislative career confirms his tax-and-spend impulses.

(more…)

Hey McCain, Why Don’t You Say Something Like This:

November 4: The Dude Will Be “Whiskey Bent and Hell Bound”

Hank Williams Jr. is stumping for John McCain today.

Will it make any difference? No. But if McCain loses, this song will keep me company on that terrible, terrible day.

NFL: A Conservative League?

I may be shallow and all that, but am I the only one who gets a sick pleasure out of knowing athletes agree with me politically? I love knowing that, Brady Quinn and Joe Thomas, for instance, are on my side, fighting the good fight. Even if they do play for Cleveland…

Owners too!

Cowboys owner big backer of McCain

“John McCain has big backers in the world of pro football, reports ESPN.com. Six of McCain’s top 10 pro sports donors are with NFL teams…”

P.S. I’m down here in Texas, trying to get the word out for John McCain and the Cowboys are really popular, so how do you say, “The Dallas Cowboys Love John McCain” in spanish? Hit me up. -Dude

Are Biden’s Gaffes Contagious?

“The Next Vice President of the United States, John McCain!”

Huh? WTF?

Published in: on October 8, 2008 at 11:26 am  Leave a Comment  
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Barack as Student #4

If this were a movie, Barney Frank would be the villain, John McCain the hero, and Barack Obama would be Student #4.

….And Harry Reid is the whiny little sister nobody pays attention to.

Kill the Bailout?

Published in: on September 25, 2008 at 8:26 pm  Comments (1)  
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